Judgement Day

Kymee had a melt down at the store today.  
I had the audacity to tell her she couldn’t pull a child’s suitcase around the store and fill it with everything off the shelves. I know – I’m a horrible mom.
She fell to the floor and started crying and screaming her high pitched wail … and didn’t stop –  I did. I stopped. I stopped shopping. I stopped breathing. I stopped thinking like a rational adult. 
The pregnant lady,
 probably with her firstborn,
glared at me as if she knew how to parent better than me.
The old lady looked at me as if to say,
“Back in my day,
I would have picked up my kid and beat their rear- end
if they did that in the store.” 

And then there was the “perfect mom”
who stooped down to her child’s level, held them by the shoulders,
 pointed to Kymee and said,
“You’re such a good boy for not acting like THAT.”

I tried to reason with my three year old. Disclaimer: I already told you I had stopped thinking rationally.

I tried to hug her and pat her back. She kicked me and screamed louder.
What I really wanted to do was sit down next to her and cry and scream with frustration. Instead, I looked around for the closest exit. 

If I had been a part of Andres’
“Zombie Survival Squad”
I would have known the fastest way of escape with a screaming toddler.
I left my cart in the middle of the isle – at this point I had to make a choice between offending the poor clerk who would have to restock my stuff or the poor customers who had to listen to Kymee scream. I choose to offend the clerks.

I picked up my screaming child,
headed for the door 
I started singing the first thing that came to my head … “I’ve got peace like a river; I’ve got peace like a river; I’ve got peace like a river in my soul.”  
We must have been a sight to see – a screaming little girl held by singing mom. Too bad no one had their phone camera on for “America’s Funniest Videos.”
I threw her in the car – still screaming, still screaming, still screaming.  As my stress boiled inside of me ready to spill over at any moment, I continued, “I’ve got peace like a river,” I started praying in my head, “Dear God, make the river have rushing and roaring waves which engulf me and drowned me with Your peace.”
As we drove down the road screaming and singing, God gave me peace …

 in the form of a McDonalds  

Now all my “Food Nazi” friends can judge me – you know who you are: you are the ones who posted Face Book pictures of the inside of you fridge to brag about how healthy you eat – or to make the rest of us, who sometimes feed out kids nothing but bananas all day, feel bad. But today, God gave me peace through a McDonalds – because as soon as we turned into the drive through line, Kymee stopped crying. She sniffled and swallowed her sobs along with the French fries.

I stopped singing. Rational thought returned. I survived to tell the tale. I survived the ridicule and stares of strangers. And I learned it’s not over til the fat lady sings, and buys french fries.

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